A rumour spreads that, once again, Facebook have changed their privacy rules to some terrible thing… do you know, unusually, I haven’t even bothered reading the details. I don’t care. I’ve had enough of Facebook and this was just the excuse I needed to remind me to deactivate my profile.
Why? Well, crucially, Facebook seems to get most of its money from scammers advertising through it. This does not sit well with me. Learn the secret of white teeth! Turn yourself into a cartoon! Frustratingly, the tipp-ex they sell you for the teeth thing is highly toxic and they can’t turn you into a cartoon. You’re stuck as a 3D carbon based meatbag not matter what the adverts say.
Then there’s the incessant changing, making things more and more complicated. This is the wrong direction for a mainstream thing like Facebook – they are sowing the seeds of their own downfall, creating an opportunity for someone to come along and replace it with something easier to use, lighter, faster and less annoying.
It seems every time I log in everything’s moved around again. It’s hopelessly overcomplicated – perfect for those who’ve got the time to spend all day playing on it, figuring out where all the buttons are and how to mute the constant stream of inane shit you’re supposed to put up with. I don’t want to go through a hundred screens to figure out how to protect my privacy properly, or how to avoid hearing that a certain person has become a vampire and do I want to become one too?
Just die already. You hear me, Facebook? Just go! Walk out the door! Don’t turn around now, you’re not welcome any more!
It occurs to me that social networking sites live or die by the sense that ‘everyone’ is on them – that would be ‘everyone’ in the sense of, “If ‘everyone’ were jumping off a cliff, would you jump off a cliff?” That ‘everyone’.
Obnoxio The Clown said...
10 Dec 09 at 11:09 pm
Aw, it’s Charlotte No-Mates.
)
Jennie said...
10 Dec 09 at 11:23 pm
In which case, YAY twitter.
subrosa said...
11 Dec 09 at 12:31 am
Oh Charlotte, what a joy it is to read your thoughts on Facebook. I completely concur. Email does me fine and it’s far more secure in my opinion than Facebook ever will be.
I’ve never understood the site and have no intention of trying more.
You’ve made a mature woman very happy because she now knows she’s not alone with this overrated social networking business.
Charlotte Gore said...
11 Dec 09 at 12:43 am
Ah, Subrosa, brilliant. I feel that same knowing I’m not completely alone in that too!
Richard B said...
11 Dec 09 at 6:31 am
Thank goodness – I thought it was just me. You articulate why I hate Facebook better than I have been able to. Not any longer. “how to mute the constant stream of inane shit you’re supposed to put up with” – precisely.
JuliaM said...
11 Dec 09 at 11:32 am
“It’s hopelessly overcomplicated – perfect for those who’ve got the time to spend all day playing on it…”
Modern day bread and circuses for Labour’s burgeoning NEET generation…
Laurence said...
11 Dec 09 at 12:41 pm
Twitter seems to offer the possibility of bite-sized pieces of vacuity to the same sort of people that like Facebook. For want of ideas, communicate!
Meandering Mammal said...
11 Dec 09 at 1:22 pm
I’ve been finding that I spend less and less time on it, I’m sick of all the trite games and assorted crap.
It has its uses though.
Al Jahom said...
11 Dec 09 at 1:52 pm
I’ve never had a facebook account. Never really seen the benefit of it, and the pitfalls are all too obvious.
One look at Lamebook tells you all you need to know.
Iggy Pop's Jacket said...
11 Dec 09 at 2:43 pm
I never joined it, in fact i never joined anything, in Belfast in the 1970s, that could be a good thing, not joining things.
“or how to avoid hearing that a certain person has become a vampire and do I want to become one too?”
I get that in Marina del Rey, I was stuck in a lift with this girl, who was a vampire, or she said she was, she looked the part.
Being the cerebral type, able to spell the names of my band’s stripper girlfriends & everything, I was a natural target.
“You’ve made a mature woman very happy because she now knows she’s not alone with this overrated social networking business.”
I would skip Los Angeles
Iggy Pop’s Jacket
Steve Tierney said...
11 Dec 09 at 3:05 pm
Faecbook is a nice way of keeping up with family you never otherwise see, and friends you would otherwise never hear from.
But it’s also a dangerous medium. I really only use it to announce new blog posts and occasionally get people to come to fundraising events.
Now if it COULD turn me into a cartoon I might spend more time there. You can never get enougb ACME stuff in the real world.
Tazia Doll said...
11 Dec 09 at 4:33 pm
“Facebook is a nice way of keeping up with family you never otherwise see, and friends you would otherwise never hear from.”
The only authentic family a person needs is a drug-dealer.
Tazia
Dick Puddlecote said...
11 Dec 09 at 9:52 pm
Tipp-ex for the teeth! Of course, why didn’t I think of that?
Hygienist go to hell, I’ve a new, cheaper, supplier now.
McShambles said...
11 Dec 09 at 11:47 pm
The problem is Charlotte that one still cannot in this country delete their profile, merely deactivate it; in effect, Facebook still have all your data and mine, even though I deactivated my profile two months ago.
Andy Scott said...
12 Dec 09 at 1:01 am
You’ll be back.
Tristan said...
12 Dec 09 at 7:27 pm
McShambles:
Seems you might be able to now:
http://www.facebook.com/help/contact.php?show_form=delete_account
Hope that works – I’ve just deleted my profile after having not used it in ages and GMail telling me something by dumping all emails from Facebook in the spam folder…
Iggy Pop's Socks said...
12 Dec 09 at 8:17 pm
What would Stalin do with Facebook?
Facebook could become really democratic, like Manchester United’s fan infrastructure.
The Premier league Facebookers could visit kids in hospital @ Christmas before heading off to a party, the type that don’t have wives or girlfriends.
Pre-festive roasting or whatever.
Iggy Pop’s Socks
Damian McBride said...
14 Dec 09 at 1:55 am
Dear Ms Gore
It was a far safer world when I was working at No. 10
Damien
Facebook sex teacher jailed
The Sun – ?Nov 25, 2009?
By STAFF REPORTER A FEMALE religious education teacher was jailed for 32 months today for having sex with a teen pupil she seduced on Facebook. …
Teacher, 39, jailed for sex with 15-year-old pupil guardian.co.uk
Married RE teacher Madeleine Martin jailed for having sex with 15-year-old … Daily Mail
RE teacher sentenced for sex with teenager Independent
The Press Association – TeleText
Emma said...
15 Dec 09 at 1:47 pm
Be absolutley sure you deleted your profile, just pressing delete with FB, basically archives your profile, it does not remove it totally.
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=16929680703
Jacqui's Bath Plug said...
18 Dec 09 at 2:52 pm
“Be absolutley sure you deleted your profile, just pressing delete with FB, basically archives your profile, it does not remove it totally.”
Like a court win in the DNA stakes?
J’s BP